"Happiness consists not in having much, but in being content with little."
This is my motto this year. When the calendar changes from one year to the next, most people find themselves reflecting on the past and planning anew. I normally run quickly away from the sentimentalism and the idealism this time of year brings about. Being overly sentimental can throw me into a depression, and idealism is just a setup for failure: another fast-pass into depression. (January is my least favorite month: way too long, cold, dark, no holidays/birthdays to break it up).
This year, however, I have been doing some thinking. And Neil and I have been doing some budgeting. Simplify is our new credo. To simplify is, alas, not so simple! I tell you, I am pretty near a champion multi-tasker. I can get A LOT done. The thing that keeps me from taking home the trophy is that everything I do is half-assed (I have tried to come up with a more PC word, but half-assed is exactly the right word.) I find it really hard to take pride in my half-assedness. It's time to let things go and let the missing ass fill in. Or, how about letting things go so there is no ass left in what I do. That's it.
As far as budget talks go, we are determined to build up our savings nice and cushy like, and quickly. (we have no debt, except for mortgage, but the savings have grown a bit thin). So with these two thoughts in mind, our new simple peaceful life begins. We have done one week, and it was ok, but the painful parts have yet to come. These painful and yet liberating parts include: giving up gym membership (argh! So painful), goodbye Netflix (nooooo!), and are you ready to hear how serious we are? So long iPhones! Yep, all 3. (For those of you reading this that call me, you will need to use the home phone #, which will be constantly busy because I have a 15 year old daughter, so you will need to email me.) Frankly, after I downloaded the ios5 software for iPhones last month and even though we BACKED IT UP, my iPhone was stripped of everything, all contacts, all blogs, all apps, we even had to call and get the phone put back on it. And you know what the clincher is, the Apple rep was a jerk, no apology and certainly no compensation. My iPhone swoon has deflated, it's much easier to let it go. Besides, my phone will still function like an iPod.
There are many other budgetry things that don't need to be aired on a blog, but I want you to know how serious we are. It's time to turn my focus on things that truly matter and not spend all my energy reserves (also a bit thin lately) on silly time-consuming frivolities. (Remind me I said this in 3 1/2 weeks when I am going through withdrawal). Really, I want my life to be about relationships with the people I love, not relationships with things. We have little Zinny home now, and the beauty of having littles is the small moments, the quiet discoveries, of being in nature, and immersion in that special magic that only littles have. They are so gentle and pure, so fresh from heaven, what distractions can compete with this?
"I come in the little things sayeth the Lord."
And I feel like I have so much to discover with each of our children at their different ages. I don't want to miss any of it. It takes time and purposefulness to have a deep relationship with each of them individually, and then again as a family.
Kind of sounds like I've got some sentimentalism and idealism going on. Well, who am I fooling? Sentimentalism and idealism are key elements of my humanity. Why else adopt or have children at all, right?
Besides, realism sucks.
I much prefer a rose colored existence.
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